Spice Girls

Shitty week this week. Noticed some bad vibes flying all over the interwebs too, people all seem to be having rubbish times atm. Boo! January, get lost. Gonna celebrate the end of the month with... MY BIRTHDAY. Yes! Can't believe I'm *nearly* 25. Well, that's 2 years away but you know what I mean - I'M ALMOST A QUARTER OF A CENTURY. That makes me feel depressed cos I thought I'd have done more stuff by now. Well I've done plenty of *stuff*, but BETTER STUFF, you know what I mean. I thought I'd have made more of myself. :(

I know why I'm in a mood of course - some new tart at the club, calls herself MARIKA (sounds like an indian spice to me, LOL) but her real name is Julia Spannings, saw it on her driving license when she left her purse in the dressing room. God that surname must have been a real curse at school, HAHA! But you should see her: fake-tits-a-rama, bet they cost a pretty penny. Seriously, she can lie down and her nipple tassels STILL point at the ceiling! (In case your wondering, it au naturale for me, taverymuch! AND ALWAYS WILL). So she's got a well-fit (surgically enhanced) body, but at least her face is dog ruff. But then that never did Jodie Marsh any harm. Sigh. And of course Tone is ALL OVER HER like a bad rash, even put her name up on the posters and bumped me back to window 2. Tosser.

Still, no matter - can do better than him anyway and better than this dive of a club. Decided I'm going to do some kind of correspondence course, maybe one in writing. Thought about getting a new job again but then I won't have as much time for writing cos I'll have to work twice as much to get the same money. Plus some of these courses are expensive! So, the plan: get some experience, get some drafts done instead of talking about em. 2011 is where its at!

Oh - and 31st January I'm ALL OVER THIS TOWN baby, gonna pull someone fiiiiiiiiiiiine! Think I deserve it. Last fella I slept with was bloody Tone anyway, about three months ago, even though we were supposed to be split (I knowIknowIknow). And the guy before that was that desperate student, whateverhisnamewas. CAN DO BETTER.

Happy Tuesday!!!

Carnation, Lily, Lily, Rose, Mavis?

Generally, I find shopping for birthday presents a real chore. Usually I find something really pretty for myself and end up buying it instead. LOL.

So you can imagine I was well chuffed when I stumbled across a print of my favourite painting – Carnation, Lily, Lily, Rose by John Singer Sargent. My usual reaction would be to buy it for myself, but I already have two prints and thought that it would make a perfect birthday present for Mavis as I’m always telling her about it and she seems to think it sounds lovely. So I buy this print from the flea market that I kinda walked in to (I had to tell Tone that the things you buy there don’t actually have fleas – LOL) and wrapped it up ready for her birthday.

I was so excited about giving it to her as I thought she’d love it. Mavis had other ideas though. Man, you should have seen her face!!!
She proper freaked out and ran (and I mean ran) and hid from it in the cupboard under her stairs. That’s the cupboard where she hides when anyone rings the doorbell after 3pm or if there happens to be thunder and lightning.
I had to bite my lip so I didn’t laugh at her.

Once she’d calmed down and I’d moved the print outside she told me that ‘the Chinese lanterns that glow give off bad omens and have a negative quality about them’ Course they do Mavis, course they do.

I asked Mavis what she wanted instead and her incredible reply was ‘CHRISTMAS PUDDING PLEASE’ Luckily, the Christmas shop at Selfridges opens next Monday so I should be able to sort her out. (YES, I KNOW THAT’S 145 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS. THEY’RE MENTAL!)

In other news it’s ONLY 3 DAYS til me and Tone go to Bestival which I can’t freaaakiing wait for.
And a note for the TFL people – STOP MESSING WITH THE TUBES. IT’S DOING MY HEAD IN.

KthanksBye. LOL.