Mothering Tuesday

Apparently it was Mother’s Day in Kenya at the weekend. One of those weird facts that come up on the MSN homepage when you sign out. I don’t really have a Mother’s Day. I have a Mavis Day instead. Mavis really does deserve a day of her own.

So I decided I would take Mavis out to celebrate Mavis Day. There isn’t a set date for her day, but I quite like June when it’s hot in the evening. I promised I’d take her out as a surprise. It has to be a surprise or else she’d come up with a reason not to go. I tried to take her to ASK a couple of years ago as she likes pizza, but she wouldn’t go because she ‘didn’t want to go to a restaurant that sounded like she was going to be interrogated.’ LOL

So this year I surprised her and found a pretty cool pudding restaurant not too far into town. I can’t get Mavis into central London, for some reason she thinks they’ll never let her back out to Dollis Hill.

Anyway, I’m a chocolate girl so I needed no excuse to go to this pudding parlour place.

When we arrived, Mavis looked pretty excited which was a relief. I had worried that she would walk out. We looked at the menu and having chosen the biggest, most chocolate filled dessert on the menu the waitress came over all dressed up in a cute 50’s dress.

I ordered my chocolate extravaganza and then the waitress asked Mavis what she wanted to eat; ‘Ermm, I think I’ll have the proftiteroles.’

I had to giggle once I’d corrected her, and told the waitress that she did in fact want profiteroles.

You gotta love her, Happy Mother Tuesday Mavis!

It's Not Rocket Science

Why can nobody do their job in the world?

Seriously. If more people actually thought about what their doing, they might actually do it properly. OK not me cos all I have to do is dance, but I'm talking about people who look at computers and stuff, I mean how hard is it to read stuff of a screen???

Like, this morning. I call the gym to book a class called Dance Jam - it's like aerobics except the instructor well fancies herself and does all these moves where she imagines she's in a music video and we muppets have to go along with her.

But back to booking. It goes like this:

NIKKI ON PHONE (that's me by the way, Ruby is my nickname): Hello, I'd like to book Dance Jam for tonight at 6, please.

[It's not rocket science, I reckon I was pretty clear with that.]

SECRETARY ON PHONE: Dance Jam? Sorry we don't do that class.

NIKKI: I think you do, I've been coming to it every Tuesday for the last six months.

SECRETARY: Hang on a sec.

[She puts phone down, much rustling. Picks it up again]

SECRETARY: I just checked the class timetable. You're right, we do that class.

[I know!!]

NIKKI: So can I book for six tonight?

SECRETARY: Are you a member?

NIKKI: Yes. My names Nicola Tuesday. Like the day of the week.

SECRETARY: OK...

[Some tapping on a computer]

SECRETARY: Oh how funny, we already have a Nicola Tuesday booked. There must be two of you. Small world, isn't it?

[Then I remember]

NIKKI: Actually that must be me and I've forgotten I've booked.

SECRETARY: Oh. Right.

Okay, technically I should have remembered I had already booked but MAN! That was one dumb secretary. Maybe I should write my script about that... Except then the secretary at the gym will find out and get me somehow, possibly when I'm in the showers and she could nick all the stuff out my locker including my underwear. OK I've thought about that too much.

Happy Tuesday!

Trying to be creative and writery.

So I’ve been trying to think of some ideas for writing an entry for the Red Planet Prize. Whenever I think of the Red Planet Prize I think of Mars Planets and then I think of Mars bars in general and then I sit and stare at the blank page dreaming of chocolate. This writing business will make me fat!

I should try harder to be serious. Maybe I should channel my past a bit and talk about being in care. I sure as hell have enough to say on that.

For the most part, my past is blurry. I don’t like to talk about what happened too much, but my dad died when I was 5. He took one swig too many from the whiskey bottle and I ended up in care. I don’t blame him though, life dealt him a bad hand, and he loved me to the moon and back. I spent a lot of time wondering ‘Why me?’ Life changed after that, I spent time flitting between children’s homes and a couple of foster families. I don’t remember much from the homes, but certain things stick out. I remember the garish clowns and cartoons painted on the walls, I remember that my bedroom was bright yellow in one home, and I remember hiding the hair clips that my dad had bought for me on a day trip to the seaside, so that no one would steal them.

The homes weren’t bad places, they just lacked continuity for me and I never felt as though I fitted in. I stayed with one foster family (Beryl and Eric) but ended up back at the home after only a couple of weeks. I never found out why I had to move back. I stayed with another foster family after that. I stayed for a bit longer but again ended up back at the home. I didn’t get on with their other daughter. I remember hearing something about her being jealous of me. I don’t think anyone’s ever been jealous of me since.

But that’s when Mavis saved me. She was definitely a little less loopy when she took me in. Still, even then she did things in her own unique way. She has a strange aversion to wax crayons that meant I never got to use them at home. She also never made me sandwiches for school, but instead liked to make me cakes and bowls of fruit. I very quickly got moved onto hot dinners by my teachers! As far as I’m concerned though, Mavis is the mother figure in my life, and I like to think I get my ditzy side from her.

I am the God of Hellfire and I bring you...

I've been reading blogs for a long time, I guess I thought it would be easy to write one myself. Only it turns out it's as difficult as writing a short story or film script. I've been reading some books and stuff, everyone seems to say different things. I'm beginning to think Lucy had the right idea using McKee to put out her husband's hair when he set it alight with fire poi. Almost as good as the time my mate Steve set his beard alight drinking Sambuca in that old disused church... My other friend Wing Hun HIT HIM IN THE FACE WITH A BIBLE (actually it mighta been a prayer book, but bible sounds funnier). Totally knocked him out. Put the fire out, too.

So... anyway. I found this if anyone's interested: The Red Planet Prize. Sounds fun. Might enter. Though not sure I could write 6 pages, never mind 60. LOL

Welcome To My Blog...

... Anybody out there?

Tumbleweed....

Hellooooooo?

More tumbleweed...

Hi, I'm Nicola - except all my friends call me Ruby. 'Cos my surname is Tuesday. YES IT IS MY REAL SURNAME. People have *way* weirder ones, seriously.

Um, a little about myself... I'm 22, I'm a dancer... Yes, *that* type of dancer, but I'm gonna get out of soon. Just as soon as I figure out how to make some money. Doing other things. Like writing and filmmaking. In the meantime I gotta shake that booty, LOL.

So, who're you?