Nothing to see here

... So move along now.

That's right, nothing, nada... nowt.

Well except a few things: I saw a green poodle in the park. Yes, it was actually green. Apparently it was in a TV ad, it's owner said. Or maybe it was one of those things they put on between the adverts on BBC1 and 2 or something? So watch out for that. (And don't worry about the poodle being green, it was a special dye... non-licky or something).

Tone's good. He got a new tattoo on Friday. I'm pretending I know what it is. Apparently it's another language, but looks like a squiggly picture to me. It's quite large and on his moob. EXCEPT HE DOESN'T HAVE MOOBS, HE HAS PECS! (LOLOLOLOL).

Oh and Wing broke up with Fabian. Then got back with him. They were broken up for thirty nine minutes and 27 seconds. The time it takes her to get from The Club, to the kebab shop, to her flat, basically.

So there you go.

But otherwise: life's great! Hope your's is too.

Happy Tuesday xxx

This isn’t just love – this is a weekend mini break!!!!

I feel just like Bridget Jones (although thinner and in a slightly different line of work LOL!) Seriously, life couldn’t be sweeter at the moment, and it finally looks as though the sun might stay out! At the weekend, me and Wing finished work and felt like eating some greasy Chinese food (you know how she loves the greasy fast food – seriously, I don’t where it goes on her!) Tone was up for that too and told us to wait for him while he locked up. Then Fabian (Wing’s new BF) called her and said he was a bit bored watching tv so we kind of ended up on an impromptu double date! Ha! Now if I had mentioned a double date to Tone about a year ago, he’d have laughed in my face or made some lood (sp?) comment about me asking another girl to join us in the bedroom, but to my complete and utter surprise, Tone was really laid back about it. Turns out, even weirder and brilliant still, that Tone likes Fabian and they were having a good old chinwag on the way to the buffet place! We strolled around Leicester Square/Picadilly Circus for a while and me and Wing started singing ‘Alllll byyyy myselffff’ a la Bridget Jones because we love the bit in the film where it says GO BRIDGET, GO on the ad boards on the circus bit. You know what I mean right? !

Anyway, then we get all carried away quoting lines from the film and I say ‘This can't be just shagging. A mini-break means true love.’ 

We carried on being loud and Bridgetty all the way to the Chinese and then Tone pulls me aside as we’re going in and whispers ‘I’m going to take you in a weekend mini-break.’ 

Eeeeeeeek! So aside from having a plate full of seriously yummy and greasy Chinese, I got promised a weekend away! It can’t be for another few weeks as Tone has to plan cover for the club, but he said it can be our little alone time instead of going to Camp Bestival. He even said he’s got a place in mind, but it’s a big secret at the moment! Ooooohhhhh I love the summer and having a lovely boyfriend. 

HAPPY TUESDAY! 

Nothing To Report

Sun is shining, life is great, Tone is great, everything's great!

Even Mavis is only scoring 3-4 on the Wierd-O-Meter (that's out of ten, normally I'd say she was a 5-6). Me and Tone went round hers Sunday dinnertime and she ACTUALLY COOKED. That's rite... not warm up something in the microwave! She hadn't used the oven in so long it went all smoky and odd and we ended up getting Chinese anyway but she did try and thats what counts!

Tone is talking about going to Camp Bestival again but I think I'd like to steer clear of everywhere we went *before* if you know what I mean. Make some new memories in new places. I'd like to go to some little place near a beach thats dead quiet and read books and eat seafood. I told Tone this sure he'd be like, "What are you nuts" but he actually said "Why not?" OK so he's not OOBER-KEEN (sp??) or anything but I can hardly blame him, I'd probably not of been six months ago and he's trying too. I have a vague memory of going to Devon with my Dad when he was still alive yeeeeeeeeeeeears ago when I was a little girl, maybe we could try that?

Hope your great too. Happy Tuesday!

The One

Wing Hun said you "just know" when you've found The One. She goes out with a bloke called Fabian at the moment - no joke, who calls their kid Fabian??? How can you look at a TINY LITTLE BABY and say, "Ah yes, the perfect name for him is FABIAN"!!! It sounds like some kind of Laura Ashley line... "The FABIAN collection... complete with drapes, soft furnishings, candles, scents....!" YIKES!

Where was I? Oh yeah. Wing says you just know. She reckons she knew with Fabian when he took her to this posh restaurant and she said she'd rather have a kebab. He didn't bat an eyelid apparently and they ran out on the bill and he got her this massive kebab out in Streatham with chilli AND cheese on AS WELL. With a Dandelion and Burdock to wash it down. That's gotta be love, right? To Wing, anyway... She loves kebabs and D&B!! How the hell is she a size 8?? LOLOLOLOL (and NO, I know whatcha thinking: dancing & laxatives & zillions of trips to the loo to chuck it all back up! No way! : P ).

TBH I always thought Wing Hun bought into all that crap from the magazines she reads and all those Mills And Boon novels. She's always got her head in one of those at work. Once she even did a peep show a reading an article from CLOSER she left on the floor at her feet, LOL. And even when I was with Tone the first time around I still didn't really get it... He never seemed to care for me 100% or even care as much about me as I did him... but that was then.

Maybe our time apart did him some good or he finally grew up - who knows - but I had a moment like Wing Hun said at the weekend. I was in the bath at his and he didn't come in getting all lairy saying he wanted to soap me up or anything like that like he might of a year ago. Instead he comes in with a towel for me. And it's a new one. And it's pink. So I say:

"Didn't know you liked pink."

And he replies, "I bought it for you to keep here, you daft mare."

That's when I knew he was The One. Who says romance is dead, hey?! hahahaha.

Happy Tuesday!

x

Home

Mavis is home! Me and Tone picked her up day before yesterday. She kept called tone Dermot for some reason, but otherwise shes back to her normal self (and when I say normal, OK I mean wierd, but wierd-normal, not WIERDWIERDWIERD like the other week!).

Tone has been well good about it all. We went over to her house before we went to get her and cleaned up, made sure all the bad stuff was gone... there was spinach and ricotta cannelloni on the hall carpet that WOULD NOT COME OUT so we went to the factory shop in town and got this well nice new rug to cover it up, it has a giant daisy in the middle. Mavis saw it and started crying! So sweet.

We got her a new fish tank as well full of Nemos and Dorys and even this underwater snail thing, it's so cool, I know someone who would approve!!! We named him George. Mavis wasn't quite as keen, said he kept looking at her funny but I told her to keep him under watch and if he starts anything I'll be round to pick him up. I can always put him in a tank back at mine.

Before she got back we had a little clear out of all the uber poisonous stuff just in case like the shake n' vac (obv) and replaced them with those natural cleaning products like white vinegar and stuff, it was Tone's idea, hes so responsible now. Mavis was only in the hospital five minutes but managed to come back with one of those french knitting needle things like these, she's making loads of giant wool sausages. She reckons shes going to make a cardigan but I don't really see how cos it just goes on and on and on and on but whatever makes her happy.

Tone dropped a bit of a bombshell last night! Reckons I should move back in to his, says I been at his four nights out of seven anyway.... Hes got a point but at the same time I've really liked having my own place and I dunno if I want to give that up yet, even for him. And I said that to him, thats how far we've moved on... I wondered if he'd go ballistic about it or start whining at me saying I can't love him or stuff like that, but he didn't! He said whenever I felt ready was cool with him. Hes like a different guy, he really is.

Anyway... suppose I better go to work, I'm on lates! There's some stag do on which always means great tips, tho TBH I can do without the lechy blokes. Still need a new job! But then some things never change... LOL.

Happy Tuesday!

x

Shiny Happy People

Best Bank Holiday weekend ever? I think so! Well, specifically Friday. And it’s not like I even got the time off work. Our club isn’t the kind of business that can afford to close on a Friday night!

I woke up at Tone’s on Friday morning. He’d been really sweet and picked me up when I went to see Mavis (who is on the mend, and will be back at home in a few days – thanks for all your kind messages of support) I was pretty starving as I’d been with her for a few hours and I hate all that kind of hospital food stuff. Bleughh. So Tone took me out for some Thai food – it’s sooooo yummy – definitely taken over as my fav kind of food – and we were getting on really well. He was making me lauh and it felt like the good old times. He didn’t mention not being on anything, but I could tell he was clean. He only had one Stella as well, so I was pretty impressed. Neither of us wanted to go home alone, and I wasn’t working, and he wasn’t due in at the club so we went back to his and watched a couple of movies. We fell asleep on the sofa, and when I woke up he wasn’t there. I was a bit confused, but went into the kitchen to see him making Angel Delight and two mugs of Galaxy hot choc. I guess that’s when I knew. I knew he had changed and that maybe we could give it another shot. I couldn’t believe I was the one who was saying it, but I just blurted out; ‘SHALL WE GIVE US ANOTHER GO?’ And the rest is history. LOL! So on Friday when we woke up, we had a HUGE fry up brunch and watched ALL of the wedding. I couldn’t believe that Tone watched the whole thing with me – that’s a changed man if ever I saw one.

Then we decided to go and join in with everyone else partying in the centre of the city and made a huge jug of Pimms. My fairytale is back on track after the fairytale weekend with the Prince and Princess. I’m feeling a bit like a Princess again. If only I could have Kate’s dress! LOL.

Easter Madness

You know how you're always ill when it's a bank holiday? Just cos all the doctors are closed you go and get a a raging sore throat and temperature, or cystitus or whatever.

And of course this one was a double bank hol, so Mavis decided to really go to town. I went over on Easter saturday for our usual lunch - microwave spinach and ricotta canelloni, but with a huge selection of Easter Eggs - and there she is in just her knickers, doing the vaccuuming, like its completely normal. Turns out she's been putting shake n' vac in the tropical fish tank too cos they're all DEAD, even her fave orange Nemo fish.

I wasn't too phazed at first cos if you remember she was quite strange over Christmas too, talking to people who weren't there and stuff. But her bro Phill died at Christmas years ago so it's a bit of a trigger for her (I never met him) and when I called the Mental Health Crisis Team they told me to ring back only if she threatened to harm herself or others, or wanted to come in HERSELF and talk to them. I got quite annoyed at the time cos I reckoned they should of come out anyway, but thinking about it later I suppose it makes sense - even if you're mental you're still a person and its not right for doctors to come out and just TAKE YOU AWAY if you're not actually hurting anyone, thats what they did in the old days of course and look what happened there! Lots of people locked away and shoved in ice baths and getting their brains fried with electric. Nice. Not.

So I persuaded Mavis to put some clothes on (she's got a tattoo on her boob! I never knew that) and she was back microwaving stuff like there was no tommorrow. I decided not to mention the fish. While she was "cooking" I figured I could move the tank - it's only a small one - to out the back where she wouldn't see it: my plan was - get some new fish when the shops open.

BIG MISTAKE.

Mavis came back in, saw the fish tank was gone IMMEDIATELY. She wanted to know where I'd taken it and why. I tried to explain she'd accidentally killed the fish but she was having none of it. She reckoned I killed them! She said some really horrible things to me, like I was always trying to kill the fish and it was my fault all the cats kept coming in the garden. It was really upsetting. Anyway she ended up throwing me out of the house and the spinach and ricotta canneloni after me, which woulda been quite funny if the bloody stuff hadn't splashed on my arm and it was still hot and IT REALLY HURT.

So I'm crying by this point and Mavis is in her house still yelling at me to get away from the front door. The neighbours are all out by this point cos loads of em are having BBQs and some of them are being real idiots, laughing at her, which makes me yell at them, so I look crazy as well! There was one nice woman - she must be new on the road cos I'd never seen her before - and she said she'd talk to Mavis and see if she could calm her down while I call the Crisis Team. I'm just about to and my mobile rings and it's TONE - I answer and he's like, "Why are you crying, I'm coming round to Mavis' right now" and suddenly he's there and a mental health nurse and a social worker and ALL SORTS and all these people are staring at poor Mavis who's now out on the lawn and SHRIEKING about her dead fish and waving a mop around like it's a light saber.

Anyway to cut a long story short, Mavis consented to treatment and went off with the Crisis Team. They're not keeping her in forever or anything like that, it's voluntary, they reckon she should be back in a few days. I told them she didn't mean to burn me with the canneloni.

Tone was really nice though, a real gent. He took me back to my flat so I could change my canneloni spattered clothes and didn't even try it on anything. Then he took me out to a few bars so I could drown my sorrows. Woke up with him of course on Easter Sunday, but I didn't freak out, it felt right somehow. So that was something - shitty weekend otherwise!!!

Hope yours was better! Happy Tuesday x